I have a confession. Ugh. It’s a bad one. Well, not bad bad. I didn’t run anyone over with my car or anything. Well, truth be told I actually have hit someone with my car – and not by accident. But that’s the point – this confession isn’t even about that. In fact it has […]

The Hug Taker

My grandmother is dying. Like, actively dying — right now in the other room. In all fairness, she should have died decades ago. A lifetime smoker with positively zero dietary restrictions (despite her seriously perfect 36-18-36 measurements; and yes, you read that correctly: her waist was fucking 18-inches-small for much of her long life), my […]

#tbt trespassing

“This is a picture of the first house I broke into …”

Desperately Seeking Sociopath

Everything – even misery – loves company.

Wednesday Q&A

“If you don’t care, why are you doing all this?”

Pleasure Delayer

“I’ll admit there was something strangely liberating about singing at top of my lungs while pissing my pants at the President’s house…”

#FridayFive: Pleasure Delayer

A list of unfathomable accidental (but totally avoidable) urination locations.

Nice to Meet You.

My name is Patric and I’m a sociopath.

Sociopath Book Club

“There are 37 members of my book club and none of them know it…”

Sociopaths for Dummies

“The first step to identifying a sociopath is knowing what a sociopath is…”