I have a confession. Ugh. It’s a bad one. Well, not bad bad. I didn’t run anyone over with my car or anything. Well, truth be told I actually have hit someone with my car – and not by accident. But that’s the point – this confession isn’t even about that. In fact it has […]
My grandmother is dying. Like, actively dying — right now in the other room. In all fairness, she should have died decades ago. A lifetime smoker with positively zero dietary restrictions (despite her seriously perfect 36-18-36 measurements; and yes, you read that correctly: her waist was fucking 18-inches-small for much of her long life), my […]
“I’ll admit there was something strangely liberating about singing at top of my lungs while pissing my pants at the President’s house…”
A list of unfathomable accidental (but totally avoidable) urination locations.